BOOK
The overall theme here is liberal whiteness using blackness/black culture to prop up whatever underlying agenda that may exist. In the book, we see two examples of this in main character Emira’s life. One is with the family she works for, an affluent white family whose child she babysits. The influencer mother tries very hard to befriend her and cross the line between their employer/employee relationship into friendship after her husband is publicly accused of racism on television and social media. The actions she takes; higher compensation, gifts, more intimate and leading conversations, are meant to lead to a genuine friendship between them. Later, when they’re featured on a news segment together, it crosses into a very performative “clean-up” type scenario.
The second example is with her boyfriend/new guy she is dating. What we know about him is that he definitely wanted black approval in high school, and went out of his way to get it and that trailed him into adulthood. First we see a flashback where he’s dressed like a basketball player, which - lol. And whenever we see him in adulthood meeting up with Kiley, he is flanked by black friends. It sounds like he’s only dated black women, or at least, for the most part. That’s his thing, he’s into it.
OPINION
I actually loved this book and I wasn’t sure if I would because the person who gave it to me said that they didn’t like the ending. The ending was fine.
The theme was super interesting and the book reminded me of Get Out, the movie. I felt very mind fucked at the end, but not surprised. Any mention of this book I’d heard before reading it always said something like black girl is accused of kidnapping white kid and it all unfolds from there. So when I read the book and that happened at the begging, I was like oh wait what? This is not what the book is about. It can’t be if we’re here already. She’s either gonna go to jail or not go to jail at this point…
As far as Mrs. Chamberlain using Emira to prop up her agenda, I do really feel like it’s normal to do that, like a self-soothing thing. To misstep, or in this case, have a family member misstep who you’re trying to protect and try to get close to someone or a type of person who isn’t a fixture in your world and make yourself feel better, then begin to overcompensate out of guilt. However, obviously a line was crossed when the manipulation came into play. Manipulating the release of a video and turning it into a television appearance, making this hesitant younger person declare something publicly that she hadn’t intended to share or a situation she didn’t plan to be in, was where things started to get off for me. Add in the power dynamic and general feeling of being lost that Emira was experiencing and the next several years would have been a slog had she not had friends who cared about her.
As far as her boyfriend Kelly *eyeroll*. One time in college, I dated a guy who used to have white dreads, but any chance he got, he put on a “bro uniform”. A button down, and like…some shoes. Already graduating from the dreads, he started out as this tree hugger, no shoes, almond milk type, and then by the time I ran into him during our 5th year, he was a fully polished bro. Meanwhile, I had done those things in the opposite direction (cool—> less cool), so we obviously didn’t grow together. When we met in Spanish class, it was pretty clear (to me) that he was angling for one of the black girls in the class. It was also clear to another friend of mine who had met him who wasn’t even in the class, so I wasn’t making this feeling up. I was the more liberal of the two us and he had a 16 pack and had cut his dreads off by then, so I slid in there.. We dated for 3 or 6 months. It was fine. We were young and expectations or whatever were low. One time during studying together, I picked up a book with a non-distinct cover, but on the inside, it had silhouette images of girls with afro hair kneeling in front of men with straight hair/one of those old- timey wigs. The book was about sex and slavery. I commented on it aloud to him and his response was “well, despite the tension during that time, people were still getting jiggy with it.” I knew that the relationship wasn’t going to work. I get that slavery is an uncomfortable topic (obviously), but if you’re unable to have a frank discussion with me within our relationship or acknowledge that slavery existed, by having a real opinion, or not using the word “jiggy” to describe rape, it’s not gonna work. I’m not asking for a dissertation. But be able to talk with me within our relationship about what we’re doing. And I know that we were young, etc. so I wasn't upset with him, but it did dull the light a little bit.
Back to Kelly. The ending of this book was so disappointing (emotionally) because I was rooting for him. We knew he hadn’t sent the video and when Emira found out, I was like omg, she’s gonna get her life together and find love! But it was such a let down once the author broke down why he loved her, EVEN THOUGH, I feel like there is a reason that there’s love there, or that the love is mentioned, etc. I know that a part of it is just science, but does that count for nothing? In a world where it’s very socially acceptable to, on a dating profile, for example, say “I’m looking for someone outgoing, adventurous, likes kayaking, enjoys good conversation, but NO BLACK GIRLS”, does the motivation for love matter? And I’m asking that having felt the way the reader was supposed to feel at the end of the book, which was “I’m actually good on Kelly.” And no, i’m not advocating for “getting what you can”. It just seems to me that men generally view a beautiful woman as a prize and black women often are often not considered to be beautiful or prizes. If a light-skinned (or white) girl is a prize to a black man or a young girl is a prize for an old man and love is allowed to develop, is that love really less valuable? If a black woman is a prize to a white man and they also find things in common and love develops, at what point or is it possible for that love to be valid?
See also: Slave Play
See also: Most of my dating experience.
Recommendations: Slave Play
QUESTIONS
When Mrs. Chamberlain’s black friend (the Uncle Tom character) says that Emira won’t have the motivation to maintain a career, is she correct? Can anyone elaborate?
In a culture where women are prizes, does any “real” love exist, and what does that qualification require besides the chemical reactions that lead to feelings of love?
-Blithe